for the past few months i felt as if i lost part of myself and wonders if ill ever get those parts of me back. now, even when im supposed to be happy, i am not sure if i truly am. what is happening and why has this happened? maybe i know but i dare not admit it. even if i admit it i cannot face it. my hearts too soft to handle what has to be done for the sake of happiness. am i too free spirited? or am i just unprepared? i am grateful, i am thankful but it still doesnt seem to be enough. everyone can tell me what i should and should not do, but the final answer and decision still has to be made by me alone. i am lost in my own thoughts. to be the good guy or the villain?
bla bla bla... going to training liao.. fuk, i seem to play worse and worse nowadays.. it's like the heart just isnt there.........
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